I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via cryingoverfictionalcharacters)

(Source: untublurdeestos)

(Source: unpopulaur, via size10plz)




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There’s a petition going around that is asking for Comedy Central to give me my own spot after The Daily Show! People keep bringing it up to me and it’s like, a strange thing to ignore (for the sole purpose of being politically correct). SO I want to like, take a moment…

Tags: daniela


my school’s principal and head of school made a video to announce our snow day you should all watch it you won’t regret it!!

(via cryingoverfictionalcharacters)


this is what it’s like being at school way later than usual

(Source: micoovav, via lumpy-pizza-princess)

taking selfies to entertain myself bc my friend is late getting here


I aspire to BE THIS

(Source: jasondilaurentis, via liamdryden)


"I’m a woman and I’m not offended by this, clearly it isn’t sexist!"

wow I didn’t realise you were the singular spokesperson for 3.5 billion people of different ages, races, religions, backgrounds, sexual orientations, social classes, and cultures, I’m so sorry

(via ravingsbyrae)